Thursday, December 07, 2006

Bells are ringing

Ah, listening to the news in the morning. It's always good for a laugh. Life just gets better and better. Now aside from being protected from our self destructive impulses to sit down and eat a plate of margarine and Crisco in a restaurant somewhere, we can talk ourselves into a state of imbecility without worry. After all of the studies that have shown that talking on cell phones will cause our brains to leak out our ears, because of the low level radiation they emit, surprise, surprise, there is a new study showing that, no, in fact you can gabble inanely as long as you want with no side effects on your new RAZR or whatever hip communication device you choose. What are all of those folks that have pissed away money on bluetooth devices, so that they could have the sound quality of 2 dixie cups and a string going to say? Probably not much, since there is the whole, "I am so much cooler than you are, because I have my wireless earpiece that glows blue." factor. I have become much more in favor of handsfree add ons as of late, even if it does mean that you walk down the street looking like you are talking to yourself like a crazy person, but I'll stick with the wired earbud until they finally get the bugs out of the wireless sets, thanks all the same.

I guess the point of this whole rant is that, in spite of being warned, cajoled and frightened with specious theories loosely based on science, the fact is that all of the experts are self styled and really are only spouting theories on dangers that have all of the substance of swamp gas. Somehow, suggesting that people exercise common sense just doesn't have that same thrill of suggesting whether you are talking on your cell phone or eating a donut that you might as well be bungie jumping into a pit of vipers with your pockets full of bricks. But don't worry kids, by the time another week roles around there will be some new percieved danger out there that will be adding a soupcon of danger to what would ordinarily be an everyday activity. God only knows what chemicals that keyboard your typing at as you cruise the web is leaching out into your system.